S4, Ep. 9: Mike

Mike Berman was conceived in Bay City, Michigan in November 1944 and was born on August 8, 1945 in Nashville, Tennessee to an 18 year old woman who surrendered him for adoption to the Tennessee Childrenʼs Home Society the day after his birth. Mike was adopted by a Jewish couple living in New York City and he was raised there. In February 1950 his Mom gave birth to her only natural child, Mikeʼs younger brother. Mike never considered searching for his birth parents until he began to see the online ads for DNA testing and finally began his search in late June 2017. In addition to DNA testing Mike discovered that because of the appalling crimes committed by the TCHS under the direction of Georgia Tann he would be able to acquire his complete adoption record from TN. Mike received those records in late September 2017 and they proved to be a treasure trove of information. In addition to his genealogical research Mike also began to read about adoption and the psychological havoc it leaves in its wake. He has also read many of the books written by other adoptees and has benefitted from the insight and understanding they have achieved, each from their unique experiences. That self-education continues and Mike expects it will go on for as long as he can keep at it. Mike is currently in happy reunion with an older half-brother and a younger half-sister, all three being the only remaining children of their common birth mother, and all of them born on a Wednesday (refer to the childrenʼs rhyme MONDAYʼS CHILD). Mike and his sister have met three times in person, most recently earlier this month. His brother lives in Rhode Island and they havenʼt met but they all keep in touch by phone and social media. Mike has been retired since 2014 and lives in Central Texas. He has been married twice, divorced once and is currently separated from his second wife. Mike has two sons, one daughter, one grandson, and one son-in-law who has the same first and middle name as his adoptive brother. All of them live in the same town and get together regularly for holidays and birthdays and for the occasional random reason. Mike has a 5 year old female cat, Clara, who graciously permits him to share her house in exchange for full-time litter-box maintenance. Mike says, “Life is good.”

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 8: Mireille

Mireille Landry is an interracial adoptee who, alongside her identical twin sister, was adopted at 3 months old and raised in a predominantly white area by white adoptive parents. Originally intended to be a closed adoption, at the age of 12, the twins coincidentally met their birth mother at the mall while traveling to a nearby city for a soccer game. This unexpected encounter marked the beginning of their reunification journey, which led to meeting most of their maternal and paternal biological family and a trip to Zambia, Africa in 2011 to meet their paternal grandparents and extended Zambian family.

Throughout this journey, Mireille's adoptive parents have been very supportive, fostering a positive relationship with their biological and adoptive families. Today, Mireille and her twin sister have met and established meaningful connections with most of their biological and adoptive relatives. Mireille often expresses her belief that one can never have too many people who love them

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 7: Faith

Faith Brady was born on 22 June 1969 and adopted one month later when the US landed on the moon. She has always known she was adopted and had a great relationship with her adoptive parents. Her parents then adopted another child, a brother, 3 1/2 years later. In 2015 she had to have open heart surgery and it was then that she became very interested in her medical history. Ancestry found a 1st cousin that let her know that ALL of the women in her family died before they were 60, including her bio mom. This set Faith on a path of discovery to find out her history, which is still unfolding as of this airing.

S4, Ep. 6: Chris

Chris Stearns is Navajo and was adopted in the mid-1960s before the Indian Child Welfare Act existed. His mom was part of the federal Indian Relocation program which moved Native Americans away from reservation to large cities as part of a nation assimilation policy. Chris began his life in the Los Angeles County foster care system and was adopted when he was 2 years old by a loving white family in New Jersey where he was raised. Chris chose a career as an attorney fighting for Native American rights and spent many years in Washington, D.C. representing Indian tribes as well as working in the House of Representatives and the Clinton Administration. Chris eventually moved to Washington state where he now serves as a Representative in the state legislature. He also was able to access his sealed original birth records but has never been able to find his birth parents. He now lives in Auburn, where he and his wife Pamela have two adult daughters and a grandson.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 5: Nancy

Nancy Davis was born in Florida in 1949 and adopted by a family from New York. The adoption was private and no documents were available to investigate her origins. An Ancestry test 6 years ago revealed that Nancy had 5 siblings in North Carolina from her birth parents, 3 brothers, and 2 sisters. It has been an amazing journey for her and has helped fill many of the “unknowns” of her heritage. She works as an EMT in her current home in Connecticut and thoroughly enjoys sharing her story.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 4: David

An unofficial adoption. David Enker was born in Amsterdam in 1970, following the Summer of Love of 1969. Relinquished a few months after birth to another family in The Hague, his birth mother, a university student at the time, had hoped to retrieve him after her studies. Although never officially adopted, things turned topsy-turvy when his new family refused to let him go. A bumpy reunion unravels in reverse

This unusual beginning, together with a life-long quest for an identity, belonging and meaning form the backbone of his recently published memoir "Phantom Parents". A heartbreaking and heartwarming work, addressing universal questions through illustrations, photographs and short stories.

Recently diagnosed with young onset Parkinson's Disease he endeavours to embrace life to the fullest. David is a creative currently living in the Dutch coastal city of Haarlem with his English-Irish wife and young son.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 3: Annie

I’m Annie O. O stands for my last name. O is round. It’s a hole I still live in, that I’m not allowed to escape. Why the fuck is that how it has to be?

Adoption has a long history, with a narrative built around it being a celebrated act of love, of charity and saviorism. I rejoice for those who experienced the best of that narrative. However, there is a growing number of investigations and reports that show, for many, adoption is not and has never been, what people are led to believe.

Why must I go to court to gain access to my identity?

Why was it considered necessary to erase my past?

Why are the adopted treated as second-class citizens?

Why are we all repeating this flawed ideology?

Why are only some people considered tabula rasa?

Where the fuck are our mothers and fathers?

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 2: Mariela

Mariela Andersen is the author of "Home Sweet Casa: A Journey to The Universal Heart". Her book is the story of her reunion with her biological family in Colombia after being separated from them at birth. Mariela’s book takes the reader along with her as she discovers more about her past than she could have ever imagined and dives deep into the multifaceted layers of what makes her who she is. Adopted or otherwise, everyone is sure to benefit from reading her story.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S4, Ep. 1: Paige

Paige Strickland is an Ohio “Baby-Scoop Era” adoptee, teacher, mom of two and grandmother of three. She is the author of two memoir books, Akin To The Truth and After The Truth. She is currently working on a YA (young adult) book-in-verse version of her books. Paige also teaches Zumba (tm) Fitness, enjoys working in her garden, loves the beach, reading and spending time with her family.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss American Baby by Gabrielle Glaser.

S3: Finale

Sarah and Louise join their season three authors, A.M. Homes, Damon Davis, and Megan Culhane Galbraith in an intimate roundtable discussion about living as adult adoptees and learning to navigate early childhood wounds.

S3, Ep. 27: Rudy

Rudy Owens is a Detroit native, born in the mid-1960s at Crittenton General Hospital of Detroit, one of the country’s largest maternity hospitals dedicated to supporting and promoting adoption. He was relinquished to his adoptive family shortly after his birth from his single mother and placed with another family after spending nearly five weeks in foster family care. His adoption story typifies many of the adoptions that were promoted by the Florence Crittenton Association of America, which ran the hospital and dozens of maternity homes and hospitals in the United States through the 1970s.

Owens successfully found his birth families in 1989 after several years of searching, working from minimal non-identifying information he found in records that he was able to obtain from the state of Michigan and the successor adoption agency that controlled his adoption and vital records. Michigan’s adoption laws then, and to this day, deny most Michigan-born adoptees their original vital records. Twenty-seven years after finding his biological kin, Owens obtained his original birth records, by court order, in 2016.

Owens has advocated for decades that all adoptees and birth parents are entitled to equal treatment under the law. His search for his records and biological kin revealed how adoptees in seeking their true records still face opposition from friends, family, state agencies, religious institutions, and a mostly pro-adoption public. His experiences with the state of Michigan and its vital records staff, the Wayne County Probate Court, and his former adoption agency demonstrate how adoptees are denied basic legal rights granted to all other citizens.

Owens’ lifelong journey to answer life’s basic question, “Who am I,” inspired him to write his public health memoir, You Don’t Know How Lucky You Are, published in 2018. In it, Owens shows how millions of adoptees and birth parents still face prejudice rooted in historic stereotypes and biological mechanisms that show “blood is thicker than water.” Owens strongly believes there is no such thing as an illegitimate person.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 26: Kate

Kate Betancourt was born in 1978 in Bogotá Colombia. She spent three months in the hospital after her Mother left, after her birth. Kate was transferred to an orphanage where she stayed until her adoption by an American couple at six months old.

Kate grew up in Michigan with one younger sibling biological to her adoptive parents. Growing up a Transracial adoptee in a mostly white area had its issues. Kate knew she was adopted and struggled with bonding with her adoptive parents, feeling lonely and flawed. Kate dealt with childhood sexual abuse. As a teen Kate was dealing with depression and self-destructive behavior , identity issues and low self worth and is thankful she made it out of that period alive.

With a need to see and know her mother and origins since she was five, Kate has been tirelessly searching for thirty-one years for her family in Colombia - over that time she has learned the process and now helps others search. Kate has always loved working with children and currently works in Mental Health. Kate has a passion for being there to support other children or adolescences who are where she was and to show them they are not flawed and to have worth, and that what they feel is valid. She also works as a Certified Adoptee life coach, consultant and mentor.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 25: Jeffrey

Jeffrey Leventhal was born In 1970 in Miami, FL, and didn’t learn until age 12 that he was adopted. He was told that he had a twin, which was just one of several lies that persisted throughout his childhood. Having never felt like he fit in and being rebuffed by his adoptive family whenever he requested more information, when Jeff was in his 20s, he decided to dive deep into his adoption only to find out there were no records of his adoption… or his birth.

Finally, over 20 years later with the help of DNA, he found the information he needed to reconnect with his natural mother, a life-changing event that allowed him to start filling the hole inside that plagues many adoptees.

But the adoption mystery still wasn’t solved - he found out that his adoption papers came from Juarez, Mexico involving a corrupt adoption agent, a disbarred lawyer, and a delivery doctor who went to jail.

Jeff has found that meeting and talking to other adoptees has helped validate his feelings and meeting his natural family has helped him understand himself better.

He has been fortunate in many ways and hopes to use his resources to reach more adoptees in search of answers and help to leave this world with fewer adoptions happening, keeping more babies within their natural families and telling the true story of adoption and its effects on people and society.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 24: Anne

A conversation with fellow adoptee Anne Heffron.

Anne Heffron, author of You Don’t Look Adopted, Truth and Agency Writing Ideas for Adopted People, Writing and Pooping, and the movie Phantom Halo, can be found on Instagram at anne-heffron, Facebook, and her website https://www.anneheffron.com.

S3 Ep. 23: Fred

Everyone learns to accept life’s twists and turns as they live out the daily rituals of their lives. But what happens when an event completely alters one’s understanding of everything about the world in which they live, including who they are? Fred Nicora brings the audience into his innermost thoughts as he sees his foundation swept away with a simple slip of the tongue at the age of forty-one, while attending a large family gathering with his children and wife. Fred details his journey to understand his new identity and re-frame his past in his memoir, Forbidden Roots.

S3 Ep. 22: Katie

Katie is an ESL teacher from Pennsylvania and was adopted in 1966 at the age of six weeks. She grew up always knowing she was adopted, but became the people pleaser in a huge Irish Catholic family always feeling like she was "on the outside looking in". After having her first child in 1995, she contacted the adoption agency to obtain her medical history and was warned, "These reunions don't always go well". Katie waited until after the birth of her second child to inquire again only to discover her birth mother had inquired about her the exact same week. Things went well with the reunion, but led to some interesting discoveries about her birth father.

S3 Ep. 21: Jay

Jay Blotcher was adopted in June of 1961 at the age of one year by a couple in Randolph, MA, a Boston suburb. His dark complexion prompted countless questions about his lineage during childhood.

S3 Ep. 20: Julie

Julie was born in Wichita, Kansas in 1968 at a Salvation Army home and was adopted 5 days later by a lovely family. She always knew she was adopted but it was not really talked about much other than to say she was "chosen" and very much wanted. Julie was born a very sensitive little girl. The parents had a child of their own 8 years prior with special needs. They tried to get pregnant again but were unable to do so. They adopted Julie not realizing the extent of their son's problems. He had severe epilepsy as well as some cerebral palsy and had many seizures most days. A lot of these seizures were traumatic and caused him to crack his head open and have to go to the hospital on a regular basis. Most of their attention was placed on him of course. Although her parents loved her very much they were not emotionally equipped to help a scared little girl with everything that happened with their son. No one was really ever there for Julie and she buried all the fear, shame and trauma inside. This continued throughout her whole life until she went away to college and finally moved away in her 20's. She has struggled throughout her life with many things including identity issues, healthy attachment, anxiety, depression, poor self image and little self confidence. In her 50's she finally came out of the fog and realized where most of her issues stemmed from. "Finding this podcast was so validating and I listen all the time. I'm so glad I found others I could relate to finally."

S3 Ep. 19: Jack/Scott/Paul

When he was ten years old, Paul Fronczak was snooping around for Christmas presents in a crawl space in his family’s Chicago home. There, he found hundreds of old newspaper clippings about the kidnapping of a one-day-old infant in a hospital in 1964. He also learned that, two years later, the boy was found and returned to his family—and that the boy was him.

S3 Ep. 18: Kay

Kay was born in Cleveland, Ohio in 1973 and immediately placed for adoption. After a stay in foster care, she was adopted into a small close-knit family. Adoption was not discussed a great deal, but it was not hidden either. Despite being loved and spoiled, Kay was never quite comfortable in her own skin. She received her original birth certificate in 2015 and was able to locate her maternal biological family quickly. Unfortunately, her birth mother died 5 months later, and the identity of her birth father was left a mystery. Kay became a self-taught genetic genealogist. Using a 4th cousin match on Ancestry DNA, Kay was able to identify who her birth father was within a few months of research. Unfortunately, she found that he passed away 25 years prior. She was able to connect with her paternal aunts, uncle, cousins, and siblings. The greatest gift was her 95-year-old grandfather and the relationship she enjoyed with him until he passed. Her story is one of self-discovery, the “passing” practice of babies of color, and the inaccuracies of non-identifying records kept in adoption files. Kay continues to volunteer to help other adoptees in search and loves solving mysteries using DNA. Kay and her husband, Napoleon, have been together for 21 years. She is a mom to Isaiah and stepmom to Myeiah. She is also Mimi to her grandson Raheem and nieces MiKiya and McKenna. She is the Principal of a K-8 school and is dedicated to serving the children in her community.