S3: Finale

Sarah and Louise join their season three authors, A.M. Homes, Damon Davis, and Megan Culhane Galbraith in an intimate roundtable discussion about living as adult adoptees and learning to navigate early childhood wounds.

S3, Ep. 27: Rudy

Rudy Owens is a Detroit native, born in the mid-1960s at Crittenton General Hospital of Detroit, one of the country’s largest maternity hospitals dedicated to supporting and promoting adoption. He was relinquished to his adoptive family shortly after his birth from his single mother and placed with another family after spending nearly five weeks in foster family care. His adoption story typifies many of the adoptions that were promoted by the Florence Crittenton Association of America, which ran the hospital and dozens of maternity homes and hospitals in the United States through the 1970s.

Owens successfully found his birth families in 1989 after several years of searching, working from minimal non-identifying information he found in records that he was able to obtain from the state of Michigan and the successor adoption agency that controlled his adoption and vital records. Michigan’s adoption laws then, and to this day, deny most Michigan-born adoptees their original vital records. Twenty-seven years after finding his biological kin, Owens obtained his original birth records, by court order, in 2016.

Owens has advocated for decades that all adoptees and birth parents are entitled to equal treatment under the law. His search for his records and biological kin revealed how adoptees in seeking their true records still face opposition from friends, family, state agencies, religious institutions, and a mostly pro-adoption public. His experiences with the state of Michigan and its vital records staff, the Wayne County Probate Court, and his former adoption agency demonstrate how adoptees are denied basic legal rights granted to all other citizens.

Owens’ lifelong journey to answer life’s basic question, “Who am I,” inspired him to write his public health memoir, You Don’t Know How Lucky You Are, published in 2018. In it, Owens shows how millions of adoptees and birth parents still face prejudice rooted in historic stereotypes and biological mechanisms that show “blood is thicker than water.” Owens strongly believes there is no such thing as an illegitimate person.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 26: Kate

Kate Betancourt was born in 1978 in Bogotá Colombia. She spent three months in the hospital after her Mother left, after her birth. Kate was transferred to an orphanage where she stayed until her adoption by an American couple at six months old.

Kate grew up in Michigan with one younger sibling biological to her adoptive parents. Growing up a Transracial adoptee in a mostly white area had its issues. Kate knew she was adopted and struggled with bonding with her adoptive parents, feeling lonely and flawed. Kate dealt with childhood sexual abuse. As a teen Kate was dealing with depression and self-destructive behavior , identity issues and low self worth and is thankful she made it out of that period alive.

With a need to see and know her mother and origins since she was five, Kate has been tirelessly searching for thirty-one years for her family in Colombia - over that time she has learned the process and now helps others search. Kate has always loved working with children and currently works in Mental Health. Kate has a passion for being there to support other children or adolescences who are where she was and to show them they are not flawed and to have worth, and that what they feel is valid. She also works as a Certified Adoptee life coach, consultant and mentor.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 25: Jeffrey

Jeffrey Leventhal was born In 1970 in Miami, FL, and didn’t learn until age 12 that he was adopted. He was told that he had a twin, which was just one of several lies that persisted throughout his childhood. Having never felt like he fit in and being rebuffed by his adoptive family whenever he requested more information, when Jeff was in his 20s, he decided to dive deep into his adoption only to find out there were no records of his adoption… or his birth.

Finally, over 20 years later with the help of DNA, he found the information he needed to reconnect with his natural mother, a life-changing event that allowed him to start filling the hole inside that plagues many adoptees.

But the adoption mystery still wasn’t solved - he found out that his adoption papers came from Juarez, Mexico involving a corrupt adoption agent, a disbarred lawyer, and a delivery doctor who went to jail.

Jeff has found that meeting and talking to other adoptees has helped validate his feelings and meeting his natural family has helped him understand himself better.

He has been fortunate in many ways and hopes to use his resources to reach more adoptees in search of answers and help to leave this world with fewer adoptions happening, keeping more babies within their natural families and telling the true story of adoption and its effects on people and society.

Also in this episode, Sarah and Louise discuss Megan Culhane Galbraith’s “The Guild of The Infant Saviour”.

S3, Ep. 24: Anne

A conversation with fellow adoptee Anne Heffron.

Anne Heffron, author of You Don’t Look Adopted, Truth and Agency Writing Ideas for Adopted People, Writing and Pooping, and the movie Phantom Halo, can be found on Instagram at anne-heffron, Facebook, and her website https://www.anneheffron.com.

S3 Ep. 23: Fred

Everyone learns to accept life’s twists and turns as they live out the daily rituals of their lives. But what happens when an event completely alters one’s understanding of everything about the world in which they live, including who they are? Fred Nicora brings the audience into his innermost thoughts as he sees his foundation swept away with a simple slip of the tongue at the age of forty-one, while attending a large family gathering with his children and wife. Fred details his journey to understand his new identity and re-frame his past in his memoir, Forbidden Roots.

S3 Ep. 22: Katie

Katie is an ESL teacher from Pennsylvania and was adopted in 1966 at the age of six weeks. She grew up always knowing she was adopted, but became the people pleaser in a huge Irish Catholic family always feeling like she was "on the outside looking in". After having her first child in 1995, she contacted the adoption agency to obtain her medical history and was warned, "These reunions don't always go well". Katie waited until after the birth of her second child to inquire again only to discover her birth mother had inquired about her the exact same week. Things went well with the reunion, but led to some interesting discoveries about her birth father.

S3 Ep. 21: Jay

Jay Blotcher was adopted in June of 1961 at the age of one year by a couple in Randolph, MA, a Boston suburb. His dark complexion prompted countless questions about his lineage during childhood.

S3 Ep. 20: Julie

Julie was born in Wichita, Kansas in 1968 at a Salvation Army home and was adopted 5 days later by a lovely family. She always knew she was adopted but it was not really talked about much other than to say she was "chosen" and very much wanted. Julie was born a very sensitive little girl. The parents had a child of their own 8 years prior with special needs. They tried to get pregnant again but were unable to do so. They adopted Julie not realizing the extent of their son's problems. He had severe epilepsy as well as some cerebral palsy and had many seizures most days. A lot of these seizures were traumatic and caused him to crack his head open and have to go to the hospital on a regular basis. Most of their attention was placed on him of course. Although her parents loved her very much they were not emotionally equipped to help a scared little girl with everything that happened with their son. No one was really ever there for Julie and she buried all the fear, shame and trauma inside. This continued throughout her whole life until she went away to college and finally moved away in her 20's. She has struggled throughout her life with many things including identity issues, healthy attachment, anxiety, depression, poor self image and little self confidence. In her 50's she finally came out of the fog and realized where most of her issues stemmed from. "Finding this podcast was so validating and I listen all the time. I'm so glad I found others I could relate to finally."

S3 Ep. 19: Jack/Scott/Paul

When he was ten years old, Paul Fronczak was snooping around for Christmas presents in a crawl space in his family’s Chicago home. There, he found hundreds of old newspaper clippings about the kidnapping of a one-day-old infant in a hospital in 1964. He also learned that, two years later, the boy was found and returned to his family—and that the boy was him.

S3 Ep. 18: Kay

Kay was born in Cleveland, Ohio in 1973 and immediately placed for adoption. After a stay in foster care, she was adopted into a small close-knit family. Adoption was not discussed a great deal, but it was not hidden either. Despite being loved and spoiled, Kay was never quite comfortable in her own skin. She received her original birth certificate in 2015 and was able to locate her maternal biological family quickly. Unfortunately, her birth mother died 5 months later, and the identity of her birth father was left a mystery. Kay became a self-taught genetic genealogist. Using a 4th cousin match on Ancestry DNA, Kay was able to identify who her birth father was within a few months of research. Unfortunately, she found that he passed away 25 years prior. She was able to connect with her paternal aunts, uncle, cousins, and siblings. The greatest gift was her 95-year-old grandfather and the relationship she enjoyed with him until he passed. Her story is one of self-discovery, the “passing” practice of babies of color, and the inaccuracies of non-identifying records kept in adoption files. Kay continues to volunteer to help other adoptees in search and loves solving mysteries using DNA. Kay and her husband, Napoleon, have been together for 21 years. She is a mom to Isaiah and stepmom to Myeiah. She is also Mimi to her grandson Raheem and nieces MiKiya and McKenna. She is the Principal of a K-8 school and is dedicated to serving the children in her community.

S3 Ep. 17: Cormac

Cormac was born into a mother-and-baby home in Ireland, which was known to be exceptionally cruel to both mother and child. He was adopted at five months old. He's always known he was adopted but it was never spoken about. Ever. He did not look for his biological family until his adoptive parents died. He re-connected with his birth mother just before his fiftieth birthday. Sadly that didn't work out. He's just recently found out about his birth father, who is deceased. He found this podcast by chance and is devouring it daily. He would like to send his gratitude to Louise and Sarah for their brilliant and insightful podcast. Each episode just shouts out something he never knew but knew all along.

S3 Ep. 16: Shari

Shari was adopted at the age of four. She spent the first year in a hospital. Then went to several foster homes after that. When she met her adopted family, there was always an open conversation about her beginnings. She always knew her story from her past, so she never had many questions. Later on in life, she began a spiritual quest to heal from journey, as a young girl. This brought her to meet a spiritual teacher, and become a healer. This powerful work helped others as well and grounded Shari into a bigger version of herself. A true, successful, story of the wounded healer.

S3 Ep. 15: Greg

Greg was born California in 1969 and placed in a closed adoption as an infant after spending 6 weeks in foster care, which was a common practice with Baby Scoop Era adoptions. Growing up, he sensed a certain ill-fit with his family, and found out about his adoption when he was 10. In 2006, at age 37, he finally discovered and made contact with his biological maternal side, and has experienced all the attendant ups-and-downs that so often accompany reunion. He was able to connect with his paternal family in late 2021, and is currently navigating the landscape and complexities of those newly-emerging relationships. Since coming out of the fog in 2021, Greg has been an active member of the online and in-person adoptee communities.

S3 Ep. 14: Charity

Charity Elliott was born in 1969 and after spending 3.5 months in foster care was placed for adoption with the State of California. Growing up in Missouri, Charity was a happy adoptee and found great comfort in her faith and in the sport of basketball. After a collegiate career that ended with her team making it to the Final Four, Charity entered the college coaching ranks where she has spent the last 25 years. Despite being located and contacted by her birth mother in college, Charity never realized the impact her adoption had on her until she lost her adopted father and shortly after met her birth father for the first time. Over the last two years, the realization of the impact of her adoption has been brought to the forefront and she's been processing all the changes that have occurred in her life. Charity has been married to her best friend and most patient husband ever, Chris Elliott, for 24 years and is the proud "mama" to a Jack Russell named Daxton Prince and all of her current and former players. She is now in her 2nd year as the head women's basketball coach at Point Loma Nazarene University in San Diego, California.

S3 Ep. 13: Jim

Jim Serrano's origins as a domestic adoptee started on January 22nd, 1962 in San Jose, California. Being adopted at 6 months of age, his journey has had many ups and downs. From childhood to his search for his biological family 23 years ago, Jim continues to heal from the trauma that is still so present in his life.

S3 Ep. 12: Emily

Emily Sinagra was born and relinquished, in 1958, at a Salvation Army Hospital for Unwed Mothers. After four months of foster care, she was placed in a closed adoption. Thirty years later, she found her birth parents and has been trying to put herself back together ever since. Writing, theatre, improv, clowning, painting, these are the tools she wields to patch and paste. Her memoir, How I got Born, is nearing completion, and she hopes her voice will collaborate with others to change assumptions about adoption and provide impetus for change. Most importantly, she is the mother of three adult children and one granddaughter. Miracles, all. Emily presently lives in Portugal.

S3 Ep. 11: Adam

Adam Anthony is a same-race, black adoptee and blogger on the platform "Onward & Upward," which explores his motivation for persona development, mental health awareness, and his adoption discovery experience. Adam is a doctoral student, writer, and podcast host of two shows, "Curiously Becoming" and "Mentorship Mondays." Some of his featured writing on his perspectives on being an adoptee has been shown in online mediums like "Love What Matters" and "Severance Magazine."

S3 Ep. 10: Ruth

Ruth Bendig is a “Baby Scoop Era” domestic adoptee. The oldest of her adoptive

parents' three children, she and her brothers were all relinquished as infants and raised in the Midwest.

S3 Ep. 9: Garth

Given up at birth, placed in foster care, then adopted by a military family, Garth Garrett grew up always knowing he was adopted. He thought being adopted was no big deal - like being left-handed in a right-handed family and that his lingering sense of longing stemmed from the nomadic life of an Army brat. Only upon starting therapy in mid-life did he discover that adoption was actually the central issue of his life, including his own alienation from his own feelings. His multiple searches for each biological parent yielded information, more heartbreak, two more rejections by his biological mother, and ultimately a deep, happy connection with his biological sisters and a renewed sense of family with his adoptive sisters. Garth recently retired after 31 years with L.A. Metro.